Whitlow Enterprises EPA Visible Emissions Smoke School

Big George Blowing Smoke Since 1984

A winning team just like The New Orleans Saints and the LSU Tigers  Howdy Partner, This is George Artie Whitlow, Big George Big Bad George. Welcome Home to Whitlow Smoke School Nation.

Where everyone knows your name

Ben Franklin said an ounce of prevention is worth a pond of cure. Daddy said it it is worth doing at all then do it right the first time. Trust Whitlow with your compliance needs.

Thank all of you for visiting our humble home web page on the World Wide Web and for allowing us to have the privilege of seeing your smiling face every 6 months at our 100 smoke school locations in 20 states. We love you and we need you.

We must be doing something right. A year after I took our smoke school commercial in September 2001, a fellow from Vulcan Materials Company called me the week before Christmas and asked us to train his employees at a plant outside of Milwaukee, Wisconsin. I did a quick spot check on the internet for the weather report and saw that the chill factor was minus 37 and the ice was 2 feet thick on the ground. I said that he was going to find someone else or wait until April. I am a Southern Boy from the great warm state of Louisiana and I ain’t never been in cold weather except for 2 weeks in October 1970 when Uncle Sam’s Air Force had the gall to send me to Iceland to inspect the aircrew life support equipment and catch the crews up on their life support training. I really had to bundle up. It was so cold that if you forgot to wear your insulated gloves, your hand would stick to the metal on the EC-121 radar plane wing and just stay there until it was surgically removed. When we took off to return to Sacramento, I looked out the window of our EC-121 and the snowflakes were as big as tennis balls and falling sideways at 65 miles an hour. I sat down in my chair by the window and said my prayers. “Lord if you get me out of this, I will give you everything I own.”

When we finally gained altitude, the Flight Engineer came to me and said there is ice on the wing and we are in for some severe turbulence. The plane bounced up and down like a yo yo. I said if I am going to die in an airplane crash than I want to be sleeping. I climbed into the crew bunk bed and did not wake up until we got to the Bone Yard at Davis Monthan Arizona. I will never forget that place with all the dead airplanes on the ground and we blew out a tire on landing.

I told Vulcan they going to have to find someone else. I don’t belong to Uncle Sam no more and I got my options. The guy said, “Big George, I heard you are the biggest,  baddest, and the bestest There ever was. Besides that, nobody else wants to come up here either. You are our last hope. Our certificates expired yesterday.” Reluctantly I found my footlocker and dug my Air Force parka, insulated coveralls; thermal underwear, and ski boots and we drove to Milwaukee.

About 30 Vulcan Employees sat in a metal maintenance building with a large diesel heater watching me blowing smoke through a rollup door. I brought 3 sets of plastic fuel lines that transport the diesel fuel from the tank to the burner. I put the extras by the heater to keep them thawed out. Sometimes the diesel froze in the plastic lines before I could get the fuel flowing. Somehow we got through it and everyone passed. It payed off.  Today Vulcan is our largest source of income. We train every Vulcan plant in Illinois, and Indiana.

We must be doing something right. Last week a Union Pacific Railroad Environmental Coordinator drove all the way from Denver Colorado to our home in West Monroe, Louisiana, because his counterparts in Arkansas said we were the best smoke school provider in the world. It humbles me to see hard working people like you take time from their busy schedule to fly to our schools from faraway places like Japan. Read what they have to say about Whitlow. Although the world economy has been struggling, we are growing consistently each year. We are growing because of a grain of faith like mustard seed, and because you are telling your friends about our great friendly customer service, attitude, dependability, and professionalism. We may not be rich or famous, but we are enjoying life and we are here for one reason, to serve you. Please check out our schedule and find a location near you. Private on site smoke schools are available for people who want to train at least 20 attendees. We take a lot of pride in what we do. Thank you all from the bottom of our hearts. Welcome home.

Roddy White, my grandfather once told me that you can’t look a gift mule in the mouth. I suppose he knew what he was talking about, because he started out as a mule skinner for the Louisiana Central Lumber Company in Clarks, Louisiana about a hundred years ago, when he was just 16 years old. At his funeral a fellow told me that Roddy never met a mule that he could not ride. My momma always used to say that life was just like a box of chocolates. You never know just what you are gonna get. Momma also said you can’t judge a book by the cover. There has grown to be a few companies out there on the internet who claim to be smoke school providers. I know most of them and I can tell you that some of them purchased their first rusted out smoke machine for $700 from Fred Sanford’s salvage yard. I have more time in the outhouse that these guys have spent inside the gates of any industrial plant in America. I can bet you 20 bucks that no other living employee of any smoke school provider company has ever made a surprise midnight inspection of a hazardous waste incinerator in their life. I forgot more than they will ever know. If I'm lying I'm dying and that is a fact Jack.

This is like hiring the new college football coach. “Well let’s see MR Boudreaux. You have never made a tackle. You have never got down low and ran into a guy full blast and knocked the ball out of his hands. You have never taken a snap from the center. You have never thrown a pass. You have never been down on the 3-point stance and had someone step on your knuckles with the cleats. You are hired. Start tomorrow. One huge problem with smoke school providers is they forgot they are there to teach. Part of the teaching, an important part, is how to take the certification test. They simply assume that you already know how. And some of you actually think you know how, but unless you have been to Whitlow, you have never been taught the correct way to pass quickly and go home. They just go on as fast as they can treating you like a herd of cows, read, read, read, so they can get through as fast as they can, so you can fail and start all over again. Some providers have enclosed operating booths for their employees to work in air conditioned comfort. They cannot even see you at all to make sure you are learning how to properly take the test. That is not how my momma raised me. She raised me to treat others like the good book says, like I wish others to treat me, with respect and dignity. We have come to call it customer service. Sometimes I would rather pay a few bucks more to go to True Value rather than spend a day at one of those warehouse stores. Whenever I hear that beeping sound and see those forklifts backing my way, I get scared they are going to back over me and smash me flatter than a pancake right there D O A on isle 31. The people at True Value will find it for you and take it to the counter. Sort of like my grandmother's neighborhood general store in a little place called Hope Arkansas.

The Whitlow Family 1944- Eloise, Artie JR, Mother Whit, My daddy George Wesley, Uncle Maurice

  Like my cousin Merle Haggard I remember when a Ford and a Chevy could still last 10 years like they should, back when Coke was still Cola, and a joint was a bad place to go. If you think smoke school is just a bad place to go, so you could spend 3 days in a yard chair taking a test over and over again, so you could earn a certificate just to hang on the wall, then you have another think or two coming. Smoke school is not just about taking a test and getting a certificate. The purpose of smoke school is to teach you practical knowledge based on experience on how to document and prove that you are meeting the requirements for opacity monitoring to prove that you comply with the laws and regulations of the United States of America and to the Republic for which is stands. A notice of an environmental violation is not a piece of cake. Most penalties start out around $30,000 and go up. I was in the courthouse not long after one of our DEQ surprise midnight inspections documented an opacity violation. Granted it was not their first cake walk. The plant appeared on the Oprah Winfrey Show. They hired 9 of New Jersey's finest lawyers. They lost a 9 million dollar class action lawsuit and had to pay a 4 million dollar fine to the great state of Louisiana. They were on every afternoon news show in America. The bottom fell out of their stock market value and they had to close the gates forever after the National Guard Army tanks busted them down.  Click here to read all about the worst nightmare.  

Somebody out their hand picked you to represent the company and come to smoke school to learn all you can about compliance. Give it 110%. We want let you down. Whitlow has 4 retired Louisiana DEQ inspectors on staff. We know smoke school and we know all you need to learn about environmental compliance. We have been there, done that, the whole 9 yards, and took a picture of it.

Some of you want to save a few bucks and find the cheapest provider out there. Read the small print. Some providers add hidden charges like overtime. Several providers are sending you mail offering a very low introductory rate just to suck you in the door. Don't be fooled. Watch it buster. Some providers charge you a reduced rate if you pay in advance. This proves that they have zero experience walking for a mile in your shoes. I have either worked in a factory or been inspecting factories most of my 63 years. I know that you have certain procedures that you are required to follow. I know that you have to fill out a requisition and get a purchase order number. We do not penalize you for taking the time to do your job the way you are expected to. We charge the same regardless if you pay now or later.

We love smoke school and we want you to learn what you need to know and have fun doing it. Life is too stressful already. We do our homework and evaluate the weather conditions and set the stage for learning. We consider all the factors to make the smoke easier to read. I have heard other providers brag that not every one can read smoke. They boast that half the people taking the test fail and this meets their quota. I have heard them say well if it is to cloudy to see the smoke, let them take a good guess. I don't care what the Jones's say, 3 days in a yard chair taking a test over and over again is not fun. We consider all the factors like 3 stack distances away, contrasting background, wind direction, sun to your back. We provide shelter from rain, snow, and sun. We create a contrasting background so you can read smoke on a cloudy day. The majority of you will pass the test the very first attempt. We feel that if you do not pass in 3 runs, then we failed to teach you how and we did not do our job correctly. We teach you how, so please pay attention. Listen, do you want to know a secret. Here is the secret for passing the smoke school certification test the first time. We bring lots of bottled water and soft drinks to keep you hydrated. We make you a fresh pot of coffee. We bring donuts. We cook you a fine lunch. We are here for one reason and that is to serve you and do it well. Don’t worry, be happy. Come to Whitlow and bring a positive attitude.

Whitlow Enterprises has 30 years experience in smoke school and environmental protection compliance inspection and enforcement. We are a family owned and operated Disabled Veteran Small Business that strives to provide stress free smoke school with customer service and lagniappe, hot coffee, donuts, soft drinks, sodas, and home cooked lunches for your convenience.  We provide nationwide visible emissions opacity training and certification. We are based in West Monroe, Louisiana and Odon Indiana and provide 100 locations in 21 states.

George Artie Whitlow  Big George Big Bad George , President Whitlow Smoke School Nation.

 My momma said, "These socks will take you anywhere. "

Welcome home veterans. We are glad you are home. I remember coming home after the Vietnam War. Nixon gave us all an early out. All of the returning warriors saturated the job market. I had a new wife and a new baby. I spent a year on unemployment and food stamps and eventually re-enlisted back in the US Air Force, because there were not a lot of jobs for life support technicians and parachute packers. Not one person came back to complain that their parachute did not open. My return to the Air Force led to my career change to environmental and eventually smoke school. All things do indeed work together for good for those who love the Lord. If you are a fellow veteran, you need a job, and are willing to relocate to Northern Louisiana or Southern Indiana email me smokeschool@yahoo.com subject job for a veteran and attach a resume and I will see what we can do for you. Been there, done that- the whole 9 yards.

We train and certify individuals to become Visible Emissions Evaluators to document compliance with state and federal air quality permits and regulations that require the use of EPA Method 9- Visual Determination of Opacity of Emissions from Stationary Sources in accordance with 40 CFR 60 Appendix A. All stationary sources such as bag houses or smokestacks to name a few,  with a potential for emitting airborne visible emissions like smoke, dust, or other particulates  are required by their permits to be read at prescribed times by Certified Visible Emissions Evaluators. Visible Emissions Evaluator certificates are valid for 6 months. Whitlow Smoke School certificates are valid in all 57 states. Whitlow also offers training in EPA Method 22, the Fugitive Emissions method, and other EPA test methods.

 Drew Brees and the Saints Record Breaking win.

Join us on Facebook: Big George    Sweet Angie

Whitlow Smoke School Nation is based in West Monroe, Louisiana, and conducts training with Lagniappe, the Cajun word for something just a little bit extra thrown in for good measure. We provide friendly customer service and a down home positive attitude. We want to turn smoke school into a pleasurable memory. Memories are made, they just don’t happen.

We do our homework. We pick and choose training locations convenient to groups of industrial plants that need our services. Gas ain't 30 cents a gallon no more. Time is money. Email smokeschool@yahoo.com - Subject: to suggest a location. The convenient locations allow us to be up close and personal in our training, because we average about 30 people per location. We don't treat you like a herd of cows. Many people have been part of our extended family for 10 years or longer. Read what they have to say about is. You will develop friendships and working relationships with our crew, other industrial plant employees, and state and federal environmental inspectors who attend our training every 6 months. We have even had a wedding or two at smoke school. We are family owned and operated. Five of our staff members are retired Louisiana DEQ employees. We are the experts in environmental compliance.

We do our homework. We select training locations that set the scene for the optimal conditions for reading the opacity of smoke. We strive to provide you with shelter from rain, snow, or the sun. We create a contrasting background so you can read opacity correctly during cloudy conditions. We take our time during the testing procedure. Before we start the testing, we give precise instructions on how to take the test and pass quickly. We observe you during practice tests and the real test to make sure you are demonstrating that you have learned the basic fundamentals, such as sun position, wind direction, distance from stack, observing the smoke at the densest part of the plume at the end of the smokestack, reading the background not the smoke, when to look at the smoke, and when to stop looking and mark your answer sheet. We use the original EPA answer sheet, where you just write your answer in the columns. If you have any questions at all, just stop us and ask. We want you to pass.

Other smoke school providers measure the success of their schools by the percentage that fails. I have heard them brag that half the people failed the test. I have herd them say, "Let them just guess if it is too cloudy to read the white smoke."  I have heard them say, "Not everybody can read smoke." Other providers forget that the words "smoke school" indicates that training is taking place. They don't train, they just test: read, read, read. They want you to read as fast as you can so they can do about 10 test runs a day. We like to Get-R-Done in less then 3 test runs, before your eyeballs get stressed out. We think reading smoke can be as natural as falling off a log. I find myself reading opacity of people burning leaves on the side of the road. If you can't read opacity, then you have not been taught correctly. Some people have been taking smoke school for 10 years and find it stressful because they have not been taught how. We are proud to be the flip-flop, the opposite side of the coin when it comes to smoke school providers. We are often imitated but never duplicated. You will find cheaper providers, but your daddy always said you get exactly what you pay for. My momma always said, Life is like a box of chocolates." Three days is a long time to spend in a yard chair throwing clipboards in the air in the blazing sun. Time is money. God threw away the mold when he created us. I don't even like the sound of the word failure. Bring a positive attitude. You can do this. This is the way that Big George was raised. We do not like to leave a location until all are certified.

We try to make your training experience informative and fun. Life sometimes is just too stressful. We present friendly competition and award prizes to those making the best scores. We greet you with a smile, fresh donuts, and hot coffee. We keep an ice chest full of bottled water and sodas for your refreshment. We serve lunch.

Lets take a little break. You have just got to see this video. Click here to see Big George and the Phantom Amish Rooster.

Hello, I am Big George Whitlow and I am the founder of Whitlow Smoke School Nation.  I am Baby Boomer, a 13 year Vietnam War USAF Veteran Environmental Health Technician, and I am a retired employee from Louisiana DEQ. I have been conducting smoke school since 1984. I founded Whitlow Enterprises in September 2001. I have handpicked a staff of professional team members dedicated to see that you receive the best available training experience. Daddy always said, “If it is worth doing at all, then do it right the first time.”  Four of our team members are retired from Louisiana DEQ. We are the experts in all aspects of environmental compliance. Just ask us if you have any problems that need solving.  We conduct smoke schools every 6 months in over 100 locations in 20 states and our certificates are valid nationwide.

Whitlow Smoke School Nation Team Member Staff

I would like to take this opportunity to introduce the team members that work together to serve you and rest of the family in the Smoke School Nation. Whitlow Smoke School Staff

 Be well. Do good work. And stay in touch. And that's the news from Lake Whitlow B Gone.

Big George Big Bad George and the Phantom 309